the TATTOO

....so i have always abstained from getting a tattoo...
i chickened out the first time I was to have it...in Koh Samui, with my best friend Portia.
Its not that I am afraid of the pain... I had liquid silicone injected on my hips, so my pain tolerance is quite high .
i just want to have a bit more meaning to my first tattoo...and my best friend was planning for a long time, so its ok for her. a tattoo isnt supposed to be done on impulse( like purchasing an ugly purse just because its on sale).

then comes this man, who has changed everything in my life.
i dont know if he is my rebound guy because i just came from another relationship.
but we got engaged ....so he is technically my ex fiance... yup. . . i actually believed i can be tied down.
there was even a flawless diamond ring...oh how i miss wearing it.
but thats another story for another time.

lesson learned though-- never get a tattoo of the name of your lover.
it will be a painful memory( trust me on this)

its like a recipe for REGRET...most of the people who gets a tattoo of their lovers always end up breaking up with their partners. its like a JINX
take a cue from angelina--of billy bob( and many many more people who has the name of their ex engraved on their skin)
so avril lavigne getting a tattoo of brody jenner means their relationship will go kaput in a month.
im just lucky I got mine just below the neck , so now i have to wear my hair long all the time.
i got another one, a flower from the yorkshire flag ( he is from north yorkshire), at least that looks just like a flower...

so in the end, after a tumultous relationship with another man...
i am single again...
and i am happy.
i have been succesfully deconstructed by people who are fucked up themselves.

im 30 with two tattoos, a bag of regrets, a good head and a nice surprise between my legs.
i will find my man...and i will make sure, my name is written ...not on his skin...
but on his heart.( im not that cynical yet)
I just know that there is someone out there, who is as crazy as me and has a lot more balls to carry a relationship with a proud transexual...
...not some fluffy pseudo- straight man who bit more than he can chew.
wow...im HATING